A Stage 4 Awakening

 As I get into my, "Mid-Life", I realize more and more that people have a hard time dealing with consistency. I mean, I am a certain way. I'm considered straight forward, honest, kind at times but often considered relentless. People want me to waiver depending on what their own personal needs are and they don't consider how I may feel having to bend. Flexibility is one thing but having boundaries and knowing the value of your time is something completely different. 

 We strive for greatness. Pushing ourselves, at times, past the point of exhaustion. What drives me? Where do I want to end up? What is the end game? I love to create. I like quiet times, just reading a book, working on a script, or fishing among other things. Peace is a great motivation and so is being able to do fun things. Either way we fool ourselves into believing that the hard work will eventually pay off. We brainwash ourselves. As if we have some magic power to make it all happen when we want. Truth is, timing is everything. Thus we must have a bit of faith and trust in the Universe. Of course the hard work helps and will eventually pay off. We just do not truly know when. 

 Just when I thought that I couldn't do much more, another gear kicked in. The energy, the ideas, the belief was there but the tipping point came from sources outside of myself. The deal was sealed today. It only takes one to dance with and we found our date. Working in the film business takes fortitude as well as artistic ability. There is an ebb and flow that becomes a dance. You go too hard and you tire quick. You go too slow and your partner loses interest. The point is, experience will help you with finding the rhythm that suits you and your future collaborators the best. 

How many times do we go near a body of water and test the temperature before plunging in and what's the motivation behind the times when we just jump right in? For me there are many factors. First and foremost, my expectation and or confirmation of a warm body of water.  I like it bathwater warm or I'm usually tip toeing in. Second motivating factor for the direct dive in is company. If I'm with my boys and we are all going in then it now becomes a competition. My daughters, I'm just going in to make sure the coast is clear and to inspire them to be brave.  Then every once in a blue moon I make exceptions. When the water is ICE COLD there is no time for tip toeing. It's all in or nothing at all. This is kind of a metaphor for life at times. I'm working on a project that took a lot of testing the waters and at times I had to jump right into the unknown. Either way I was swimming and wet. The only way to be in the game is by getting into the water if not you are j...

How good does it feel to write down a goal and actually see it come to fruition? Checking that box of, not  things to do, but things that are done. Whatever the goal, I feel a pep in my step, when I hit the target. I have actively set goals for decades now. It's wild to say that out loud but it is true. Over time I've made some outlandish goals and though I didn't feel badly about not hitting those in the given timespan that I set, I did learn that setting obtainable goals to keep the ball moving down the field was more beneficial than trying to accomplish things that require way more work and knowledge than I could put in or obtain at the time. That being said, I have written out my 2025 goals and had a wonderful closing to my 2024 with the edit and delivery of a feature film, Finding Faith. I look forward to sharing the news of where the film lands. This film was shot in the summer of 2024 with much preparation put in beforehand. I worked with my friend, Lazrael Lison, wh...

Day to day routine. I make choices moment to moment that show me my commitment to the goals that I have set for myself. I found myself scrolling one evening. Clip after clip hitting on the senses that apparently hit the pleasure senses. Luckily I was able to snap out of it and realize that my algorithm had been set and I was hooked. In a blink of an eye 45 minutes was at the end of the day wasted on media that did not serve the mission or build me up. If it is not adding then it is taking away. Time the one asset that can never be replaced. Those minutes are gone but I can change what I do that got me into that downfall. Erase the problem. Cold turkey. Commit to the commitment. Do what you say you are going to do.